29 October, 2013
So I was going down to the lobby to post the mail in the middle of the day when out of nowhere, he suddenly appeared, AGAIN, casually sitting on the bench with his cell phone to his ear. I don’t know why I was startled to see him. I should have almost expected him to be there. I don’t know how he does it, how he seems to be everywhere at once. The first thought that popped into my head was, “He’s probably planning his next mission”. It was one that made me chuckle as I smiled and nodded to him on my way out of the building. And then it struck me, “THAT’S IT! THAT’S now he does it – my (sort of) new neighbor was really a superhero in disguise!”
I always thought there was something a little unusual about him. And not just because of his clothing. He’s unusually reticent, always has a super serious look on his face –he’s French I think, has a young daughter and a friendly, tall attractive wife who always seems to be way better dressed than him. (They always look a little bit out of place together, although you can tell they are a real couple.) Maybe she’s had to work hard to keep his identity hidden from the rest of the world. Like Mr. Incredible. But I’ll call him Running Man, because every single time I have ever seen him in the last six months, he has been wearing the exact same outfit – running shoes, nylon jacket and these impossibly short shorts -the kind that make you want to look away. I don’t think the guy owns a pair of pants. Even in 50 degree weather. At odd times of the day, in odd places I will run into him wearing the exact same outfit. Unless the guy retired early with a closet full of shorts and sweat jackets, I’m guessing he has a secret identity and this is his ‘uniform’ to try to fit in with the rest of us unsuspecting mortals. I mean, what else could explain it? Could he be working for the CIA?....Nah. Too boring. Too mundane. Too casual!
Just the other day I saw him as I was getting into the elevator. He was getting in with his daughter and I with my son. He said almost nothing. A grunt maybe and nod of his head. I glanced over at them sideways and wondered if she knew about her father. She was just as quiet as he was. Maybe she too was a superhero in training. Like Violet. Maybe she had a superpower as well. My mind raced…
The last time my husband and I ran into his wife she was alone, and I was struck by how incredibly chatty she was, so completely opposite of him. Aha! She had to be the sole mortal in the family. In fact, it was her job to throw us off the scent, to distract, to make us unsuspicious. It had worked up to this point. But no longer, I thought to myself…I was onto you, Running Man!
Of course I could be completely wrong. The poor guy could just be a self-employed father who has a really flexible schedule and who likes to run (although I don’t think I’ve ever actually seen him running). His power is probably speed. He runs so fast that he cannot be detected by the human eye. Eh, maybe not. Maybe his reticence has something to do with him being French. Maybe it’s cultural. Maybe he’s just not that comfortable speaking in English. At any rate, I like my theory better. I like the mystique. In fact, let’s step it up a notch. I’m calling you ‘Le Coureur’ from now on. Oui? Sounds pretty ‘tres chic’ if you ask me. Yes, from now on you will be known as ‘Le Coureur’. I like this new name, this new identity. And even though it may sound like I am mocking him, somehow, secretly, I bet he would too.
